F3 Knoxville

Author: Waffle House

Tune That Name

THE SCENE: Spring
F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER Are we allowed to call it F3 again?
WARM-O-RAMA:
SSH, Cherry Pickers, Rockets. I read somewhere that if you can do 40 Merkins, your chances of dying in the next 5 years are really low. So statistically, whoever didn’t skip reps is doing OK.

10 Burpees OYO in honor of Crawdad and Jumbo’s standard on-time arrival.

THA-THANG:
Moseytown USA.

Every 5th light pole we pyramided up to 5 burps, 10 merks, 15 squats, 20 LBCs. Then back down.

Up towards the Asylum, where various spectators had come with tickets to the gun show. We Bearcrawl 360d our way over to the center of the Colosseum, and it turns out all they really wanted was to see Mr Jinxy in action. Take a number, ladies.

We played Tune That Name, winner moseys while loser holds position. Gore, plank, arm circles, lunges for everyone, and we provided melodic entertainment for a couple at the cafe table. I think it’s safe to assume we saved their marriage.

Native American run down the dragon, and Q forgot how fast US State’s Attorneys run, so Choirboy got in some extra mileage after a late directional call from Q.

The Cloud is as closed as Amazon is to a Robertson Dickens thriller that mentions COVID, so we made use of the Pavilon for some Box Baby Box Rows, followed by a wall sit that severely tested our ability to endure Convoy’s deep concentration.

Over to the stairs in honor of Crablegs who is doing calf raises somewhere in the fine state of Florida today.

Then to the Meadow for some Jack Webb, just in case anybody had anything left.

PAX choice whether to sprint or Bernie up mini cardiac (finally paved! What the what?!?).

Q made the unwise decision to sprint and it almost cost him last night’s Dead End barbecue.
MARY:
Mary is a High Heels kind of a thing, and High Heels was fartsacking.
COUNT-OFF & NAME-O-RAMA
CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:
This thing is dragging on and it’s time for me to recommit to loving my family well, not being a jerk, and being kind. But the way for me to do that is not to decide and just make it happen – that doesn’t really work, not for me anyway. I have to recognize my need for Christ (pretty easy to do if I take the time) and then out of gratitude for the life he’s given me, I more or less naturally find myself wanting to love people better.
MOLESKIN:
Great to have Beavis back in town! Praying for Choirgirl, Swimmies’ friend, and of course Mrs. Lilly.
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Go download The Other Virus by Roberston Dickens! One of these days he’s going to sew up that legendary pectoral, and when he does, we’re all in for a really bad beatdown.

The Burpily Feud

THE SCENE: Shorts Weather, but for real
WARM-O-RAMA: 

Those tricky SSHs where we do the last 20 in silence to see if everybody can count and stay focused. We came close, but it was 10 burpees for those of us who showed up on time (looking at you High Heels and Cheatsheet). Cherry Picker stay-downs, more baby arm circles than anybody wanted.
THA-THANG:
We moseyed low and slow, like Pele after Beaujolais. QIC stole a trick from the Lillydipper hisself and did some nickel-dime-quarters all the way to the Area 51 dropoff. Everest is for the kind of people who like wet feet and shaky legs; we were not those people.

Whatever else happens today, one thing went just right: 10 PAX came up on 10 CMUs up by the Esplanade construction. PAX choice CMU AMRAP. Question: where’s the only place Cheatsheet’s going to find singles? Answer: Wendy’s. Mans hits the double count every time. Don’t cheat yourself. Fist emoji.

Catch me if you can to the Cloud – thank you Curveball for not catching me the second time.

The Burpily Feud! No uhs, ums, pauses, or repeats.

Have a Nice Day on the 2 count.

My old college roommate Jack Webb showed up. I hate that guy.

Up the Little Hill and yours truly was shot.

MARY:
Who Mary?
COUNT-OFF & NAME-O-RAMA
10 good ones. Lillydipper, Rooney, Curveball, Choirboy, Abscess, High Heels, Mr Jinxy, Goober, and Cheatsheet, plus YHC.

CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:
Sic transit gloria mundi.
MOLESKIN:
Thanks men, for getting me out there again. I would not do any of it without you.
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Convergence next week!

G-6 is Raw and QVC Doesn’t Need Oxygen

THE SCENE:  9000 feet of Colorado Rocky Mountain High. 15% humididty, 25% dust. G-6 in his natural setting, leading father-son camp.
F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER Sure but is there enough oxygen getting to your brain to understand?
WARM-O-RAMA:

Stole camp van from nonprofit ministry. Drove 1.5 miles on the road up to Cottonwood Lake. Parked, hid keys so nobody else would steal stolen van. QVC did about 30 seconds of what must have been D1-level stretching, so YHC did too. Warm-o-rama complete.

THA-THANG:

  • Ran uphill until Q couldn’t breathe and called for PAX to stop
  • QVC wasn’t even breathing heavy but he stopped anyway.
  • Walked until Q regained consciousness, then resumed run
  • Ran 1.5 mi up to Cottonwood Lake
  • Found a fishing pier on the lake, did baby arm circles forward and back.
  • Merkins to failure
  • 30 squats
  • Ran 1.5 mi back to stolen van. 30 more seconds copying QVC’s D1-level stretching
  • Returned stolen van.

MARY:
Mary is overrated  when there’s no oxygen in the air
COUNT-OFF & NAME-O-RAMA
G6 had so much energy and testosterone that he had to work out separately or he would have hurt us. QVC and Waffle House co-Q. Barney fartsacked twice. Matlock posted the day before, so that counts.
CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:
Thinking about how we can better understand and serve our wives.
MOLESKIN:
Special thanks to G6 for hosting us at Spring Canyon. Incredible!
ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Gibbler is Always Ready

THE SCENE: The kind of morning where nobody signed up for Q
F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER No but he lack of Q could be read as a meditation on the meaning of the word “volition”
WARM-O-RAMA:
SSH x 30 IC. Rocky Balboas on the curb. Squats.
THA-THANG:
Let’s get it out of the way that nobody signed up for Q. Normally that might precipitate some real Headlocking, Iron Sharpening, or High-Impact soul searching, but for the Tuesday AM crowd it’s an opportunity. Gibbler’s always the fastest out of the gate, and he took the Q quicker than anybody else could. Considering his travel schedule, YHC estimates that he Qs at 83% of the mornings he posts. This morning, on the fly, he cooked up:

  • An unholy pyramid of table rows, Irkins, and three other things I can’t remember and don’t want to remember
  • Calf raises (Gotta keep those Legs Crabby)
  • A boatload of Bulgarian squats, step ups (don’t judge, youngsters…your back will one day deteriorate like ours), and bicycle kicks. Imagine what kind of mind can think up this kind of torture on the spot.

YHC wanted to be Gibbler’s understudy so we invited Jack Webb to the party. We tried Ascending Testicles (probably not a repeat), and picked up the CMUs. Mixed in with some burpees and bernie, that took us home.

MARY:
Not when your timing is as good as Gibbler’s
COUNT-OFF & NAME-O-RAMA
CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:

MOLESKIN:
ANNOUNCEMENTS:

It’s High Heels in the End Zone

THE SCENE: If there was a nicer Saturday morning to work out in, I don’t want to know about it
F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER Cap’n was there, so I think that covers us
WARM-O-RAMA:
Archie and Cap’n were in cooldown mode after 3 rucking miles…Pusher and Crawdad were pulling in…

10 Windmills IC while waiting for Crawdad and Pusher

25 SSH, but only 5 IC. The other 20 we were supposed to do in our heads. We did not all end at the same time. Could’ve been Q’s fault. 10 Burpees OYO.

BAC forward and reverse, OHCs in between

THA-THANG:

Little Mosey over to the base of Spaceship Hill. Catch Me If You Can with 10 LBCs to the stop sign on the far side.

Another mosey down to Area 51, which has missed us, and which also had an unidentified structure. We took it apart and did some CMU Doras. Pusher found a hole that was hiding, but recovered on the mosey like the badass that he is. 

Indian run over to the FiA parking lot, where Abcess had already delivered baloons. We presented them with a birthday present, candle, and we sang Happy Birthday. Q started us off about two octaves too high but he is not paid for his beautiful singing voice.

Down to the soccer fields to meet Jack Webb! Back in college we used to play Ultimate Frisbee, so we played in Jack’s honor. 2 burpees for everyone if the frisbee touches the ground, 5 merkins for a team that gets scored on. High Heels got the Golden Glove Award.

MARY:
Mary Schmary

COUNT-OFF & NAME-O-RAMA

CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:

Rats and roaches live by competition under the laws of supply and demand; it is the privilege of human beings to live under the laws of justice and mercy.”
― Wendell Berry

MOLESKIN:

ANNOUNCEMENTS: