F3 Knoxville

DORAS Galore!

THE SCENE: Rare gem of a day! 80 degrees, sunny, low humidity.


Done and Done!

– 20 SSH (4-ct), in cadence

– 10 Windmills (4-ct), in cadence (We came close to starting over because PAX lost count, except for Jetlag, who bailed everyone out.  Then the smart-alecks started exaggerating the count, shouting it out excessively loudly, which was actually kind of hilarious)

– 10 Steve Earles, (4-ct), in cadence

– 20 Grady Corns (4-ct), in Cadence


MOSEY to rock pile below Coliseum. BATTLE BUDDY UP!  Each set of partners pick up a pair of equally sized rocks. Alternate carrying the rocks between the partners as we run around.  High Heels picks up a pebble so small that a toddler could easily lift it. 🙂

MOSEY to parking lot below Coliseum. DORAS! WINGS UP x 100

  • Partner 1, RUN up to end of roundabout, 10 ROCKY BALBOAS (2-ct), run back
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100

MOSEY to stop sign at southern corner of circle drive. DORAS! WINGS DOWN x 100

  • Partner 1, BERNIE to tree about 50 yards away, 10 SSH, run back
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100.

MOSEY to Amphitheater. DORAS! WINGS OUT x 100

  • Partner 1, Run up hill, 10 JUMP SQUATS, run back
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100.


  • Partner 1, Run down stairs, 10 HAND RELEASE MERKINS, run back
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100.

MOSEY to Stop sign at northern corner of circle drive. DORAS! CURLS x 100

  • Partner 1, BEAR CRAWL to edge of guard rail, 10 Diamond Merkins, run back
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100.

MOSEY to grassy area on north side of Pickett’s Charge. DORAS! ROWS x 200 (since these are easy…)

  • Partner 1, EL CAPITAN to tree about 10 yards away up the hill, 10 IMPERIAL SQUAT WALKERS , run back
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100.

MOSEY to Rock Pile. DORAS! PUNCHES x 100

  • Partner 1, REVERSE LUNGE up hill, 10 MOUNTAIN CLIMBERS, run back.  (These didn’t work too well.  Really tough to actually reverse lunge uphill, although Abscess gave it his absolute best.  This was actually hilarious, as he was trying to go backwards, but really not going anywhere.  TClaps for trying, though). Modified to forward lunges or Bernie up the hill instead.
  • Partner 2: Do exercise, until cumulative total = 100.


Leg Stretches
18 strong! No FNGs. Grid Iron not tagged.

The Screwtape Letters were written by CS Lewis to his good friend, JRR Tolkien. The character Screwtape is a senior demon in hell who counsels his nephew, Wormwood, how to corrupt a human (called “The Patient” in the letters).  Wormwood is rather incompetent, and wants to try all sorts of extravagant tricks on the Patient, but Wormwood counsels him to take a more nuanced approach, such as the one depicted in this letter.  As he says to Wormwood in another letter, “… the safest road to hell is the gradual one – the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts“.  The take home message of the letter that Judge Judy posted in the 3rd F channel is that disagreements on things such as politics can distract us from our internal (i.e., religious) growth and development.  So next time you feel your blood pressure rising after watching cable news, or see you that one post on Facebook that you are just dying to respond to, maybe try to take a deep breath, disconnect, and focus on something you can do to serve your community, your family, your God

Prayers for several PAX going through difficult challenges, particularly with health issues to them or their families.
Wesley House work day this Saturday! Off the Chain CSAUP coming up.  Start thinking about Hardship Hill teams!

Pyramid Laps

THE SCENE: Cloudy and humid, but SOOO thankful for relatively cool temps (80 degrees) and a nice, gentle, whispering breeze…


Welcome to F3, Fitness, Fellowship and Faith. F3 is a free workout program designed to improve fitness, share some camaraderie, and foster male leadership in the community.  I’m Pele and I will be your Q today.  I am not a professional, and I do not know your fitness level or injury history.  Please push yourself, but modify the workout as necessary to avoid making any existing injuries worse.  The goal is to get better together!


– Motivators (5-ct, descending)

– 10 Windmills (4-ct), in cadence

– Michael Phelps

– 10 Tempo Seal Claps (4-ct), in Cadence

– 10 Tempo Overhead Claps (4-ct), in Cadence

– OYO leg stretching


MOSEY to parking lot below Coliseum.

  • Pyramid laps! Partner up with like speed. Run opposite directions, Every time you meet (half way and back at start), do the following exercises in REPS of 20
    • LAP 1 Merkins
    • LAP 2 Merkins, LBCs
    • LAP 3 Merkins, LBCs, Mtn Climbers (2-ct)
    • LAP 4 Merkins, LBCs, Mtn Climbers (2-ct), Bobby Hurleys
    • LAP 5 LBCs, Mtn Climbers (2-ct), Bobby Hurleys
    • LAP 6 Mtn Climbers (2-ct), Bobby Hurley s
    • LAP 7 Bobby Hurleys

MOSEY to Amphitheater

  • Goal is to do each group of exercises, going up to top of hill after each group is completed, for a total of 5 times up the hill. Can be done in any order.  Exercise groups are:
    • 20x: LBCs, BBSs, American Hammers (4-ct), Bicycle Kicks (4-ct)
    • 20x: Merkins, Carolina Dry Docks, Bottle Taps (4-ct), Diamond Merkins
    • 20x: Bobby Hurleys, Iron Mikes (2-ct), Froggie Jumps, Squats.
    • 20x: SSH (2-ct), High Knees (2-ct), Butt Kickers (2-ct), Mountain Climbers (2-ct), Smurf Jacks
    • 10 x: Cherry Pickers (4-ct), Windmills (4-ct), Grady Corns (4-ct)

* we only got about 1/2 way through this before we ran out of time.

AYG Mosey back to AO.

LBCs until 6 caught up.

Q called time prematurely, so we did tempo squats (10, 4-ct, IC) and 5 burpees just to make sure those guys keeping REEEAAALLL close track of time got their money’s worth! >:)

9 HIMs, no FNGs.  Grid Iron not tagged.


Awhile ago, I heard the story of college basketball player, the starting center, who made a vow when he was young to never play basketball on Sundays.  His team made it to the Final Four, and then the championship game, which, unfortunately, was to be played on Sunday.  He explained his predicament to his coach and teammates, and they tried to convince him that just this one time, couldn’t he break his commitment and play?  Here it was, the biggest game of his life… why couldn’t he just make an exception?

In the end, he sat out the game.  As he explained it later, the nature of the promise wasn’t as important as the keeping of the commitment.  He said in the end it was an easy decision.  It’s much easier to hold on to your convictions 100 percent of the time than it is 98% of the time, because then you have to make decisions constantly instead of simply sticking to your guns.

It comes down to a choice about marginal benefits in measuring the value of your life.  Is it ok to do something wrong or unethical just this ONE TIME, for a benefit? Or is your life filled with greater meaning to forego that temporary benefit so that you can assure yourself you have fulfilled your promise to try not to sin, even though we understand and accept that we are all, in the end, sinners.

Prayers for Biscuit and Wax Job and their families as their loved ones struggle with serious health issues.  Prayers for Jinxy and Lilydipper as they continue to heal.  Praise for Thunderstruck, who is getting married Saturday, and praise that Jinxy has been able to get out and attend workouts, modifying as needed.

Wesley House volunteers needed; CSAUP at Dog Pound end of July.

Big Shoes to Fill

THE SCENE: HOT! 90 degrees, mostly sunny, but a slightly coolish breeze kept it from being unbearable.  Pele is going to melt this summer…!


– 20 SSH (4ct, IC)

– 20 Moroccan Nightclubs (4 ct, IC)

– 10 Windmills (4 ct, IC)

– Leg/hamstring stretches, left leg over right, then reverse.

– 10 Plank Jacks (4 ct, IC)


Warm up Mosey around Admin building.  Picked up Pusher on the way back.

  • EVEREST SUMMIT PYRAMID: Do the exercise, then run up Summit each time. Wait at the top, come down as a group.  Cheer on your fellow PAX!
  • Exercises will be the following (all single count, 15 sec count in between rounds)
    • 20 Iron Mikes
    • 20 Iron Mikes, 20 Jump Squats
    • 20 Iron Mikes, 20 Jump Squats, 20 Merkins
    • 20 Jump Squats, 20 Merkins
    • 20 Merkins
  • MOSEY to grassy area near Roadshow Run. Three cones will be laid out for a BEARMUDA TRIANGLE!
    • Bear crawl to first cone, 1 Burpee, second cone, 2 Burpees, third cone, 3 Burpees.
    • Rinse and repeat x2 (only one Burpee per cone on the second round).
  • MOSEY to Intersection of Trail and Road
    • 20 American Hammers
  • MOSEY to stop sign at northeast corner of Admin building drive.
  • DORAS: Partner 1 Bernie Sanders to end of Guard Rail, then runs to tree, 1 Burpee, then runs back. Partner does the following:
    • 100 Gas Pumps / 100 Pickle Pounders / 100 Froggy Jumps
  • AYG to AO.

Random assorted mix of core exercises.

10 men, no FNGs. Lilydipper and Jinxy met us for the Board Meeting


As many of you know, Lilydipper stepped down as our AOQ last week.  He’ll be out for a while because of his hip, and there needs to be someone who’s here at the AO on a pretty regular basis, so he and the leadership team asked me if I’d take on the role.  At first, I was reluctant. As I told them, Lilydipper is the one who first introduced me to F3 and the Fake Gloom PAX, and is one of my closest friends and mentors in the world, and I he’s our AOQ, simple as that.  But, as with the Nan’taan position, it’s a good thing to transition in fresh blood on a regular basis and give more people a chance to take on leadership roles. So I accepted.  But the first thing I want to do is for us all to convey our deep appreciation to Lilydipper.  I wouldn’t have come to my first F3 without his introduction to what it was all about, and after that horror show, I damn sure wouldn’t have come to my second one without his encouragement.

So you Fake Gloomers are stuck with me for a bit.  It’s a pretty hands-off position.  I’ll make sure the Q calendar gets filled up, let everyone know about general stuff going on, but I do want to re-emphasize a few things that I would like us to focus on a bit more going forward.

  1. Community Service: We are here not only to work out, but to become better leaders, and to be a leader you first have to be a servant.  I ask each of you to evaluate how you can better serve your community, families, and churches.  Leaders must lead by example, and by actively participating in helping others, you take that first huge step.
  2. Cheerleaders for each other: We need to be cheerleaders for each other, as well. One of our biggest resources and source of strength and encouragement is each other.  Let’s continue to verbally encourage the man to your left and right during workouts. I know if I hear a “Way to go, Pele!”, or a “Finish it off, don’t quit!” from one of you Bozos it really encourages me, gives me a second wind.  Fist bumps and high fives, are back on the menu, too, now that COVID is relaxing its grip.  Help each other get through the workouts, especially now that the summer heat is upon us.  And this goes for stuff going on OUTSIDE the AO, too.  Personal issues, just a simple question about well-being, etc. can go a long way.
  3. Re-commitment to the values of F3. For some of us that have been in this awhile, there’s a tendency to take it for granted.  To just show up, get in a little exercise, maybe have a cold beverage at the Board Meeting.  But I’m going to try to re-commit myself to the basics again, and I hope you join me.
    1. Form. Not cutting corners. Especially when we’re tired.
    2. Positivity. Open to all men, all religions. F3 is apolitical.  We hear enough of that stuff on the news or in other facets of our lives.  Let’s keep that out of our community.
    3. As Crawdad says, show up, but SHOW UP ON TIME! Let’s recommit to being here by 5:45 pm. We often seem to double our numbers from the time the disclaimer begins to when we mosey, with a few stragglers arriving even later. Being on time shows a commitment and respect for the PAX.

In short, I want us to be the leaders in Knoxville in the way we work out, the way we support our communities, and the way we commit to a common cause of self-betterment through service. I’ve been proud as heck of our contributions to service drives, F3 Knoxville events, and our commitment to embracing the Suck.  But we can always be better.  There is more work to be done.  Let’s GO.

Prayers for Lily’s wife, who is undergoing a heart test on Thursday.
Big Ball convergence cancelled, sign up for Dog Pound CSAUP ASAP!

Don’t Widen the Plate!

THE SCENE: Soooo beautiful! Upper 60s, popcorn clouds, nice amount of sunshine.



-30 Split Jacks (4-ct), 15 each leg, in cadence

– 10 Cherry Pickers (4-ct), in cadence

– 10 Rockettes (4-ct), in cadence

– 5 PCMBs, OYO

– 10 Grady Corns (4-ct), in cadence


PE EXAM (Hat tip, Erector)

MOSEY to STOP SIGN SOUTH OF ADMIN BUILDING, in a nice shady spot in the grass.

P – 10 Prisoner Cell Merkin Burpees aka PCMBs.  Basically, a burpee with 3 merkins and pulling each knee to your chest between the merkins (see F3 Exicon).

Near same tree, up to nearest hill and back…

E – Elevens – squats at the bottom and BBS at the top.

MOSEY across street to curved road that leads to gravel parking lot.

E – Escalator – BEAR CRAWLING! Fives cones: 1) 10 Burpees, 2) 20 Squat Jumps 3) 30 Imperial Walkers, 4) 40 SSH, 50 lunge-walks back to start.

MOSEY to field below Coliseum


KRAKEN:` 6 cones in a circle, with Ab exercises in blue, and upper body exercises in red.  Do the blue exercise, then run around clockwise plus one cone and do the next exercise.  Rinse and repeat until back and starting point.  Then do the same thing, in the opposite direction, doing the red exercises.  * Didn’t have enough time, so we just did one circuit, alternating between blue and red exercises at each cone.

  • Blue exercises:
  1. 20 BBS
  2. 20 Gas Pumps
  3. 20 Box Cutters
  4. 20 LBCs
  5. 20 Bicycle kicks (4-ct)
  6. 20 American Hammers (4-ct)
  • Red exercises:
  1. 20 Merkins
  2. 20 Carolina Dry Docks
  3. 20 Shoulder Taps (both shoulders =1)
  4. 20 Diamond Merkins
  5. 20 Bottle Openers
  6. 20 Wide Merkins

MOSEY to small parking lot below Coliseum

X –Xs and Os , on Q’s call

MOSEY to Coliseum (… which had food trucks on it, and was being used by some people, so we went to the roundabout and did “A” there, substituting Bobby Hurleys for Bench Jumps)

A – Aiken legs – Done in succession with no rest — 20 Squats, 20 Box Jumps, 20 Lunges (10 each leg), 20 Split Jacks (10 each leg forward).


JAIL BREAK back to AO for the last letter.

M – Mary

Captain Thors
11 dudes

An old coach named John Scolinos, who had begun coaching in the 1940s, once spoke at a Baseball coaching conference in Nashville, Tennesse in the 1960s. His talk was called, 17 INCHES.

He walked in with a home plate hung around his neck.

He said, “You’re probably all wondering why I’m wearing home plate around my neck.

“Do you know how wide home plate is in Little League?”

After a pause, someone offered, “Seventeen inches?”

“That’s right,” he said. “How about in Babe Ruth’s day?”

Another long pause. “Seventeen inches?” a guess from another reluctant coach.

He repeated the same question for high school coaches.  Minor league coaches.  And those who had any experience in the big leagues.  The answer was always the same.  17 inches.  “That’s right,” he said.  “And what do they do with a Big League pitcher who can’t throw the ball over seventeen inches?” Pause. “The press calls him a bum and they send him down to the minors!”

“What they don’t do is this: they don’t say, ‘Ah, that’s okay, Jimmy. If you can’t hit a seventeen-inch target? We’ll make it eighteen inches or nineteen inches. We’ll make it twenty inches so you have a better chance of hitting it. If you can’t hit that, let us know so we can make it wider still, say twenty-five inches.’”

Pause. “Coaches… what do we do when your best player shows up late to practice? What if he gets caught drinking? Do we hold him accountable? Or do we change the rules to fit him? Do we widen home plate? ”

“What do we do when our kids misbehave, break the rules, and tell lies?  Do we widen home plate?”

“What do we do when our politicians lie to us, fail to live up to the moral standards that we expect out of our elected leaders, and stop doing what’s best for us and the country?  Do we widen home plate and say, “Well, that’s ok, the other side does it too”.  Or do we hold them to their actions, even if we consider ourselves in the same party as them?

We don’t teach accountability to our kids, and there is no consequence for failing to meet standards. We just widen the plate!”

“If I am lucky,” Coach Scolinos concluded, “you will remember one thing from this old coach today. It is this: “If we fail to hold ourselves to a higher standard, a standard of what we know to be right; if we fail to hold our spouses and our children to the same standards, if we are unwilling or unable to provide a consequence when they do not meet the standard; We have dark days ahead!.”

Coaches, keep your players—no matter how good they are—your own children, your government, and most of all, keep yourself at seventeen inches.  Don’t widen the plate.”

Jinxy and Lilydipper joined us for the Board Meeting!
Kickball tournament this weekend.

All Hail the GOATS!

THE SCENE: Perfect! Sunny, mid 60s, slight breeze… we will miss this when it’s 95 and humid.




-20 SSH (4-ct, IC)

– 10 Windmills (4-ct, IC)

– 10 Plank Jacks (4-ct, IC)

– 20 Moroccan Nightclubs (4-ct, IC)

– Little of this and that


MOSEY to Amphitheater.

  • JINXY’S FOUR AND A QUARTER. Start at bottom of hill, run to top of slope and do 25 reps of an exercise, return to starting position.  R&R 4 times, totaling 100 of the exercise.
    • Round 1: Carolina Dry Docks
    • Round 2: Imperial Walkers (single count)
    • Round 3: Lunges (single count)

MOSEY to field across from Area 51.

  • LILYDIPPER’S FOUR CORNERS. Cones will be laid out in a square.  Move around the square 3 times, doing the exercises listed, in order.  Move to the next corner by the method indicated.
    • CORNER 1: 20 Merkins/ 20 Shoulder Taps (4-ct) / 20 Bottle Openers (4-ct). Sprint to Corner 2.
    • CORNER 2: 20 Box Cutters / 20 BBS / 20 Gas Pumps. Bernie to Corner 3.
    • CORNER 3: 20 Star Jumps / 20 Bobby Hurleys / 20 Tempo Squats. Bear Crawl to Corner 4.
    • CORNER 4: 20 Mountain Climbers (4-ct) / 20 Hurpees (Burpee without the Merkin) / 20 Plank Jacks. Skip to Corner 1.

MOSEY to Area 51

– 20 American Hammers, Run up slope to tree stump…

– 20 Pinto Twists, Run up to Street…

– 20 Rocky Balboas



  3. BOTTOM OF SUMMIT: 10 Burpees
  4. TOP OF SUMMIT: 25 LBCs.

We didn’t have time to do the whole Grinder, so we did the top exercises (Smurf Jacks and LBCs) at the top of the summit, ran down, did the Burpees and BBS, then charged back up.

No time for the old gal…

15 strong!
This workout honored some of the Goats, which is the name we gave ourselves sitting around at the Board Meeting a few years ago when we were by far the oldest AO.  In particular, I wanted to pay tribute to some of the guys in the DOUBLE RESPECT categories who were not able to join us this afternoon because of various ailments and injuries, namely PINTO, JINXY, and LILLYDIPPER.  There are several reasons we use the term DOUBLE RESPECT title, and sometimes we tend to gloss over it, or simply yell it out automatically in the BOM.  But these workouts are damn hard, and age makes them even more challenging, as I’ll be the first to tell you.  So there’s respect for the fact that the older guys are getting out there and busting their rear ends side by side with the younger crowd.  But also, these are the elders of our F3 community, and these three have been with the program longer than almost everyone else out here.  They set the example of how it should be done, and they may not be able to keep up with the rabbits in the group in terms of pure speed, but after being in F3 for 3 years I can tell you that no one does it better.  Their dedication to the tenets of F3 and in encouraging the next generation never flags.  It’s important to them to pass that torch on to the younger guys.  I remember Pinto getting on me for resting instead of keeping moving when I was standing in line to go down the stairs on the Grinder Circuit (“There’s no standing around! Keep moving!”).  I remember Lillydipper telling me how great I was doing and encouraging me when we I was absolutely dying going up Cardiac for the first time.  (And by the way… just watch Lilly when he moseys… he keeps running all the way to the stopping point, when 99% of the rest of us pull up 20 feet short and walk. ) And I remember Jinxy refusing to quit after pulling a leg muscle mid-way through his second lap on Hardship Hill a few years ago when I was running with him as a partner.  Dude had one leg, but he kept on going.  So thank you to our Double Respect warriors.   Their age may be pretty high, but you know what?  So is the dang bar that they set for the rest of us as F3 brothers. LONG LIVE THE GOATS!

Prayers for Lilly, Pinto, and Jinxy.  Prayers for the Austin East Community as they try to heal following the shootings and violence they’ve experienced the past year.
Don’t forget to pick up something for the Safe Haven and World United Ministries charity drive!