F3 Knoxville

Author: Waffle House

Mailbag Monday

We properly disclaimed!
Coolio bears all responsibility for anything that happens out there.
THA-THANG:
Today’s workout was sponsored by the pax and all the post-Thanksgiving mail that was received. It was an eventful long weekend and we were able to explore some of the more interesting details.

It’s true that none of us can outrun mortality, but practitioners of Junk Science can rest easy knowing that they’ve certainly, definitely, allegedly bought themselves a ten year delay.

Side straddles were hopped, shoulders were blasted, yoga-pose stretches were bungled, but with sincerity.

The Cloud awaited and on it we 5/10/15ed some Box Baby Box Rows.

Things got serious. We visited the Dark Webb. We made it all the way down to the famed Eighth Level, where the Q was beyond his ability to lead. It was the perfect time to Have a Nice Day.

We Curlsed for the girls, and then we got on the TB Rocket Ride, which is a little excursion on Cardiac in memory of certain Thanksgiving deprivations some of us may have endured in the past.

I had planned some bear crawling, but we ran out of time. Next Q.

CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:
A rabid HS football fan has me praying for justice and mercy.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
DM Hands and tell him you’re coming to the Rocky Hill parade on Saturday!

The Peoples’ Q

Right at the top your Q wants you to know that this entire workout was conceived, planned, workshopped, peer reviewed, revised, enhanced, approved by legal, focus grouped, and finally today was delivered to you, the PAX of Asylum.

Perfect fall morning.

Everybody is welcome and everything is disclaimed. Choir Boy is in private practice now, so if you want to sue somebody you can hire him.

Our warmup today included Motivators, stretching, Rockettes, and Rocky Balboas for Rainbow who we missed by just a couple of minutes.

We did some nickel-dime-quarter in honor of its inventor and our own Bionic Man Lilydipper. In trying to avoid bothering an innocent bystander, we ended up getting in her way even more, which is what Gibbler likes to call a Q Fail. Mentioning his name when he didn’t even show up is another Q Fail.

The PAX makes certain demands, and Base Camp to Space Camp is one of them. When the PAX speaks, the Q listens, so into a hornet’s nest we ran. Snitch took one for the team and is presumably on the couch right now in a Benadryl coma.

What’s a trip to the Cloud without some Jack Webb you ask? We don’t know.

Crawdad wasn’t there in person or in spirit, but we did curse him under our breath with a couple of trips up Cardiac.

Convoy couldn’t be stopped all morning and he led us back down to the AO.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
The academic side of F3 is one of the least often talked about, but it does provide valuable insight, and in the case of a recent study we learned about the major difference between AM and PM guys, according to family and friends. We did our best to remedy the inequality. We did it for the families!

The Hands Hot Lap

Perfect fall morning.
8 motivators, some other stuff, and then no Shoulder Blasters! Let it never be said that your Q doesn’t do anything for you. I saved your shoulders for Jack Webb.

We did the Hands Hot Lap – 10 minutes of running in a circle. There are some among us, I assume, whose watch told them how far they ran in those 10 minutes, what their pace was, what their heart rate got up to, and how many calories they are assumed to have burned. Your Q is skeptical of gadgetry and doesn’t care about the data: he just wants to be like Hands.

We made our way to the Pavalon for some partner stepover/table row/LBC 7s when Gibbler decided he’d had enough and made up a story about his wife having to go save lives at the hospital or something. Sometimes you have to make time for what’s really important, like Jack Webb.

Gibbler bailed and we kept going with some baby Everest runs, and then it was time to cash out. (See tomorrow’s Saturday Q to find out the shocking results of some graduate studies on the big differences between AM guys and PM guys, as reported by their wives, children, and friends.)

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Today was the last day for @Crime Scene, the F3 Ford that didn’t miss a single day for three weeks. Showing up even on Sundays is real commitment and we will miss you Crime Scene.

Trivia Night

After being properly motivated, we did some Stretchies and we vowed to trust the (Junk) Science. Everybody got 10 years of invincibility; you’re welcome. PAX was quiet, so we did some Shoulder Blasters because that always gets people complaining.

Trivia Night at F3 commenced. If you or your partner got a correct answer, you were both exempted from burpees before the next exercise. Some guys know sports, some guys know art and literature, some guys know history. Some guys (looking at you, Lulu) just start doing burpees.

We hit the Cloud for some Descending Box Baby Box Rows, then traveled to the Caribbean for juuust a hint of a Sutherland Seabiscuit. Just a skosh. The faintest whiff.

Speaking of Seabiscuit, Convoy and Swimmies are like two thoroughbreds among a bunch old mares on their way to the glue factory. They beat us to Cardiac, where we only had time for one and a half Crawdad Comebacks.

Two things about your Q: 1) he is not going to make you do knee-based air presses on asphalt, and 2) time management may not be his strong suit. So we couldn’t complete a full round of the Dark Webb, and it was all Q’s fault. But as Donald Rumsfeld said, “You go to F3 with the Q you have, not with the Q you wish you had.”

MARY:
Lebowski pointed out another ill effect of Q’s poor clock management, which is that we didn’t go by the ATM and none of us has cash for the weekend.

Sincere gratitude to all F3 men for leading and participating in workouts. I wouldn’t do anything if it wasn’t for you all.

Philippians 4:10-13.

World Wide Webb

THE SCENE: Shorts Weather and Mitten Conditions
WARM-O-RAMA:
SSH, Stretchies, Tie Fighters. I would have taken us all the way but I knew we needed unblasted shoulders.
THE WORLD WIDE WEBB:
Jack Webb + lap

The Pop-up Ad (Jump Squat/2-ct Iron Mike) +2 laps

The Cryptobubble (Dip/2-ct Aw Yeah) + lap

The Compuserve (Table Row + Bicycle) + AO/Baby Everest lap

The Dark Webb (Burpee/SSH)

The Dark Webb turns out to be pretty dark and the Q was toast. Crab Legs is made of sterner stuff so he led us in a Bicep Burnout. Mall Walkers halfheartedly joined us for Tempo Squats. The addition of Gibbler turned the mumblechatter into a mumbleroar, as predicted.

CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:
Dads, yours and your kids’

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
¡ASYLUM CSAUP THIS SATURDAY!